I get it, you’re pissed off at life. Most of us are. But when you stop focusing on what is ruining you and start to focus on what could possibly fix you, there is in fact an end to the madness, but only if you can see it.
I was you. I was mad, dear god was I mad. I know what you’re thinking, “oh, poor little rich girl didn’t get her way…” wrong. so wrong.
On top of being rejected by society, bullied by peers, molested by a family member, assaulted by a family member (resulting in me almost losing my kidney) being diagnosed with PCOS, and, to top it all off, at the brink of my modeling career, being attacked by the rottweiler in the face.
You think you’re angry? I worked hard for everything, and by no fault of my own, it was ripped away. When I got home from the hospital I smashed every mirror I saw, I couldn’t stand to even look at myself. I had become a monster. No one wanted to be near me, I was filled with so much hate. I even gained weight, close to 30lbs, what did I care? I hated everything.
FAST FORWARD 4YRS TO PRESENT DAY
I never want to be that hate filled person again. When I destroy something, I feel no better inside. Don’t get me wrong I want to hit something, so I have a punching bag for that. I am just beginning to restart my life. But because of my anger, my mental incapacity to move forward, I have lost friends, ruined relationships and ultimately lost 4yrs of my life to a sentence of sick thoughts.
If you feel yourself losing it, please, go speak to someone. You don’t have to take meds, they won’t lock you up, just please, go get it off your chest. You’re hurting everyone around you, and in the long run you’re hurting yourself the most.