Sometimes I feel my heart pounding through my chest, like I’m a deer being chased through the forest. There’s no reason for it. And yet. Here I am. Contemplating every action I’ve made that led me to this weak person I allow myself to be.
You start thinking about the bills that haven’t been paid, the bills coming up, the person society wants you to be and the person you think you are, and lastly, the person you really are. Does anyone know who they really are? Are we all deluding ourselves? Pretending?
Sometimes I feel so damn powerless. I just want to get off this crazy train, sit on the mountainside and have a coffee on a blanket, and just watch the view. Just watch, with no deadlines, no sense of urgency or fear. Just watch the beauty.
Why I am still sitting up after 2 sleeping pills bouncing my leg wide awake?

No wonder Marilyn died of an overdose. Sometimes you forget how much your body can handle in comparison to what your mind can handle.

As much as people want to watch those that are beautiful, sometimes beauty needs a break too.

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This entry was posted in anxiety, confidence, control, depression, girlproblems, hope, marilynmonroe, nervous, numb, opinion, outcast, overwhelmed, PCOS, psychotic, truth and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Overwhelmed

  1. Anxiety and Panic attacks are so dam detroying to your body, mind, and life. But after being on Benzos for a lifetime, and working on a withdrawal plan now that is crazy with the amount of Xanax I was taking. I found out 6mg of X is equivalant to 120mg of Valium. So it looks like a long hard process to get off of them like it was along road getting that high of a dose. But the Zombie lifestyle will kill you. Sex was the only thing I had going for me, and when I noticed a slow down of my libido, I took drastic actions. benzos.org/uk


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