“How to fight loneliness, i smile all the time” -wilco
Being alone isn’t so bad when the TV is on or the music is playing, but 3 days without meds and silence is an anthem to slit your wrists to.
So, I played music in my head, and of course wilco began playing.
I remember my head mistress in England saying to me, through her oddly enough wrinkled face “you know carolynne, it takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile, you’ll get wrinkles like that.”
So I tried, just now to force a smile… It was like trying to lift a 100lb dumbbell (for me) my lips quivered, they couldn’t quite do it for no reason but against better judgement they did. For a moment I felt like a grinning fool. But also for a moment I felt ok.
Now to figure out how to paint the smile on permanently…